18 Thoughts Edinburghers Have During The Fringe

It's August again, people. Action stations.

1. 'Where did all these people come from?'

'Did Glasgow close down or something?'

2. 'Hello, old friend.'

'It's udderly delightful to see you again.'

3. 'I wonder which famous people I'll spot this year?'

Via giphy.com

'One time I saw David O'Doherty eating spaghetti and it was awesome.'

4. 'So many dead trees.'

'I hope people are recycling their flyers...'

5. 'I could totally be a comedian.'

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'Like, shoes, OK - how weird are they? They're like little houses for your feet, amirite? I'm so right.'

6. 'Why is it raining again?'*

*Note: not a Fringe-specific thought.

7. 'Why is it so hot in this venue?'

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'I can't tell if I'm still wet from the rain outside, or if I'm actually melting.'

8. 'Where did all my money go?'

'I just won't eat for several months.'

9. 'This guy's so funny, I must remember his name for next year.'

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10. 'What was the name of that really funny guy I saw last year...?'

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'F... T... Ca... Bo...?'

11. 'I don't remember a time when I wasn't in this queue.'

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'Maybe if I scream 'Fire!' everyone will flee and I can get to the front.'

12. 'I didn't know I had so many friends.'

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'Welcome. Please feel free to take over my home. Of course it would be silly for you to get a hotel when I have space here for free. No, it's no trouble. No, really, it's fine. Just remind me - how do I know you again?'

13. 'It's pronounced 'Buck-loo.'

'And 'Wynd' is pronounced 'wined', and 'Corstorphine' is pronounced 'Cu-STOR-fin', and 'Portobello' is pronounced... 'Portobello'.'

14. 'Where did the Meadows go?'

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'They were, like, right here.'

15. 'We're under attack!'

Via knowyourmeme.com

'The Norwegians are coming! We're all going to die! Hold up, no - it's the Tattoo.'

16. 'Must avoid Royal Mile, must avoid Royal Mile...'

'GET OUT OF THE WAY!'

17. 'Man, I hate the Fringe.'

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'It's noisy and busy and expensive and troublesome.'

18. 'Dude, I totally LOVE the Fringe!'

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'It's awesome!!!'