1. You want your tree to look AMAZING this year. You have visions of your dream tree.
You want your tree to look better than this one.
2. You visit the ‘Christmas Tree Adoption Centre.’
But you cannot afford these wonderful trees. They’re too expensive.
3. The trees you can afford look broken or are…
4. Maybe you should wait for a bit. Or maybe put up that fake tree. You know, the one stored in the coffin.
5. Trees sold on Dec. 27 are so much cheaper.
SOD IT. LET’S SPEND £/$9999999999999999999.
6. TIME TO TAKE THE TREE HOME. But first it needs to go through the greatest machine in the world.
Is this how they bag oranges?
10. Welcome to the fun “will the Christmas tree fit into the living room I really don’t think it will” stage.
12. You find the tree lights. They look like this.
“I swear I put them away untangled at the end of last year.”
13. It might take a little bit of time to untangle them.
Even worse, the lights might not work at all…
14. After the light level? THE BEADS AND TINSEL LAYER.
You spend hours trying to decide what the theme will be for your tree this year.
17. Of course, you have saved something very close to your heart to place at the top of the tree.
18. YOUR TREE IS NOW DONE.
19. And then, when you least expect it…
…the whole bloody thing falls over.
20. It’s a brand-new day. You visit the tree.
Don’t worry about the pine needles. You’ll be seeing them till about March.
23. Until the tree dies…in April.
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