Quiz

BuzzFeed Entertainment Editor, UK

BuzzFeed

Channel 5 is known for incredibly dramatic documentary names. But can you tell which of these are real, and which ones are fake?

Channel 5 is known for incredibly dramatic documentary names. But can you tell which of these are real, and which ones are fake?

Can You Tell Which One Is The Real Channel 5 Documentary?

But can you tell which Channel 5 documentary is the real one?

It is about a father who believed he was a King after being told by God to have seven wives. AS YOU DO.

It is The Girl With Seven Mums!

Which Channel 5 documentary is real?

Yeah. That's right. This documentary is a bit grim isn't it? There's also 'Autopsy: The Last Hours Of Michael Jackson' to enjoy watching during a cold night this January.

It's Autopsy: Last Hours Of Whitney Houston.

Okay. Which one of these are real?

The thing I love about this documentary is how it is a sequel. So does this mean that these animal attacks are less scary than World's Scariest Animal Attacks 1?

It's World's Scariest Animal Attacks 2!

Right. Here's another one.

Bit weird, this doc, since the word's 'True Story' and 'UFOs' aren't normally seen side by side. But there we go.

It's Close Encounters: The True Story!

How about this one?

It investigates whether losing weight leads to happiness. So don't lose weight. DON'T. JUST EAT MORE PIES. GO ON.

It's I Lost Weight But Lost My Husband!

See, it really isn't that easy is it?

A documentary about snakes. No, not that kind. Stop.

It's Nigel Marven's Giant Snake Invasion!

Here's another.

I wish it was Nazi Secret Golden Penis. I really wish it was.

It's Nazi Quest For The Holy Grail!

And another.

Nope. The Nazis didn't have a Titanic of their own. It's a doc about a forgotten propaganda film made by the Nazis. But the words Nazi Titanic is a lot more catchy isn't it?

It's NAZI TITANIC!

Which one of these are real?

Channel 5 have a tendency to show A LOT of these old 'Audience With' programmes. This Cliff Richard one features special guest Elaine Page. What a joy.

An Audience With Cliff Richard

And this one.

There's A Rhino In My House!

And finally, this one.

AWFUL! That was awful. Absolutely embarrassing. I mean, even Keith Chegwin's "Naked Jungle" wasn't that bad!

Oh shit.

That's terrible. Really quite bad. The Wright Stuff is currently having a debate about how bad your score was and the presenters and callers all think that you did really really bad.

Oh dear!

Errrrrmmm... That's not very good is it? But at least your judgement is better than Channel 5's Doctor Karl Kennedy decision to keep his band together.

Oh my!

It's not all too bad. You could be doing a bit better. So for a special treat I bought you tickets for 'An Audience With Cliff Richard'. Enjoy!

Uh oh.

YOU DID OK! So to celebrate you've been awarded a Nazi tank. Play safe.

OH YEAH.

Your judgement is ok, so celebrate you have been forced to watch every episode of Home and Away back-to-back forever.

YAAAAAAAAAY.

WOW! 7 out of 10. That's hot. You're just as steamy as Karl and Susan's will they / won't they relationship.

YES YES YES YES.

WOW! 8 out of 10. You're nearly as good as Channel 5's owner Richard Desmond. Nearly, but not quite.

WELL DONE YOU.

WOW! You're judgement is spot on. You're just as successful (and as loathed) as Celebrity Big Brother.

OH YEAH BABY.

WOW WOW WOW WOW WOW. Here are the keys to Channel 5. Just take them and do what you want. JUST TAKE THEM!

BOOOOOOOOOOOOOM.

OH DEAR! That's not very good. It's nearly as bad as Harold Bishop's storylines in Neighbours (remember when he died and then came back again ten years later. YEAH THAT)

OH NOES.

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Can You Tell Which One Is The Real Channel 5 Documentary?

Channel 5 have incredibly odd named documentaries.

Can You Tell Which One Is The Real Channel 5 Documentary?

Channel 5 have incredibly odd named documentaries.

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