1.As Kyle Smith pointed out, women will NEVER get Goodfellas. Seriously, WTF is this movie? A story about a bunch of guys and they're NOT strippers? No thank you.
2.I'm sorry, but a gun is a weapon, not a friend. No matter how little!
3.I saw "Dirty" and said "ewww, gross!" Women like to be clean.
4.Uhhh, hello? The first and second rule of Fight Club ARE THE SAME. Like, how did nobody catch that, not even in the edit?
5.Why are those hockey players wearing glasses? I mean, like, just get some contacts, right? If a woman wrote this movie, she would NEVER have made it so confusing.
6.This guy is the ultimate L-O-S-E-R. If I wanted to watch a guy try to ask out a girl who's way out of his league, I would go to literally any bar in Williamsburg.
7.Lost from the beginning. Why would a guy that hot have to pay for sex? Also, why does he care so much about a stupid egg? Newsflash, I can get a dozen eggs for $1.66, and that's with bird flu.
8.Are these people or cars? Seriously, please tell me, because one minute they look like people and then suddenly they have wheels???
9.Watched this movie twice and guess what, THERE ARE NO LAMBS. No cute little lamby babies running around, with their giant eyes and soft white wool.
10.They should have left him to die.
11.The fact that these guys didn't start fucking each other made my vagina so mad it started weeping. Why else would they be wearing such little clothing? If they weren't gonna take the rest off?
12.Do we have to use guns? I just feel like this would be so much better without guns. Oh, and silly color names! Real names would have been so much easier to understand.
13.Is this how all women are made? From dolls and computers? I tried so hard to understand the science in the movie that I broke down and started crying. Guess Tim Hunt was right ;)
14.Wait, is this what happens when my boyfriend and his bros go camping? They didn't even make s'mores!
15.Is this really what Scottish people look like? I've never been, so I'm not sure, but I had thought they just had, like, red hair or something, not green skin.
16.The main characters are animals. Uhhh, I'm a human? How am I supposed to relate to a dog?
