1. A burning desire to get the hell out of your college town.
Big fish, small pond. Am I right?
2. Which, of course, prompts your sudden motivation to apply for ALL of the jobs.
Optimism is seeping through your pores.
3. All of your friends’ posts about engagements, weddings, and babies make you want to cry, vomit, and delete all social media.
Just plan your fairytale life on Pinterest and continue to repeat your mantra: “Career first. Career first. Career first.” Shabby chic weddings and chubby babies can wait.
4. All of the questions about your future are extremely annoying.
One more question about post-grad plans, and you’re gonna go ‘American Psycho’ on some people.
5. You often wonder why you didn’t just follow your parents’ advice and pick a more traditional career path, but you don’t quite regret coloring outside the lines.
6. Your Senioritis is finally justified.
You don’t even care that you don’t even care.
7. After 8+ semesters of college, you’re feeling more than a little ready to let loose.
Turn down for what?
8. You’re simultaneously happy for and jealous of your friends who have already landed their first jobs.
See #5. I hear Liberal Arts majors make wonderful baristas.
9. To say you’re a little afraid would be the understatement of the year.
Wearing adult diapers to an interview is socially acceptable, right? Asking for a friend.
10. You’ve never felt righteous indignation of this proportion before.
You stopped being upset with yourself after the 30th rejection letter. Now you’re just pissed that employers don’t see what your mom sees in you.
11. You can’t believe it’s all actually happening.
They’re actually giving you a diploma. Let that marinate for a second.
12. Sadness AND happiness? Sappiness? Hadness?
What are all of these feelings?
13. You eventually come to terms with everything and accept your fate.
Is this adulthood?
14. Now that you’re wiser and more mature, you have a bit more gratitude.
Don’t let the degree go to your head. You wouldn’t be walking that stage if it weren’t for the ‘rents.