1. If you grew up Muggle, it comes as QUITE the shock when you get your acceptance letter.
2. Then you have to go to Diagon Alley. Shopping there is basically a NIGHTMARE. Why don’t wizards have Amazon?
3. Also, there is always a chance you might end up in Knockturn Alley, which is basically a combination of the mall and HELL.
4. On the Hogwarts Express, you might OD on sugar from Chocolate Frogs and Bertie Botts Every-Flavored Beans.
5. And crossing Hogwarts’ lake can get a bit dicey if the weather is bad. At least the giant squid is there to save you!
6. Then if you’re a first-year, The Sorting Hat will make basically the biggest decision of your life. Are you going to be a Gryffindor lunkhead? A Slytherin douchebag? A Hufflepuff dweeb? Or a Ravenclaw smartass?
7. Seriously, how are you supposed to keep your figure while eating all the food in the Great Hall?
8. Getting a Howler at lunch? Why can’t your mom just text you like a normal Muggle parent?
9. Then you have to deal with classes. If you’re not in Slytherin, you’re TOAST when you have Snape.
10. And no matter what house you’re in, McGonagall will NOT be impressed.
11. There’s always the chance you might die during Care of Magical Creatures.
12. Or a Venomous Tentacula or Mandrake might end you for good in Herbology.
13. Also, how are you supposed to pass Divination? Does anyone ever know what the HELL is going on in Professor Trelawney’s class?
14. Worst of all might be Defense Against the Dark Arts. If you’re lucky, you get a werewolf for a professor. On the flip side, you could end up with Lord Voldemort.
15. If Hermione is in your class, good luck. Most of the time, she’ll make you look like a complete doofus.
16. And Malfoy? He’s the Justin Bieber of Hogwarts, the spoiled brat who will make your life a living hell.
17. In the hallway, you have to watch out for Filch and Mrs. Norris like your life depends on it.
18. Peeves. Just, Peeves. No explanation necessary.
19. Finding your way to class is a nightmare. Not only are the staircases like escalators from hell, but you have to watch out for vanishing steps.
20. If you’re a witch (or maybe even if you’re a wizard) you’ll definitely have your heart broken by Cedric Diggory.
RIP Ced :(