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    70 Candles You Could Get Your Mom For Mother's Day

    Unless, y'know, she somehow already owns these.

    1. Patchwork Vest

    2. Old Quilt

    3. Hearty Peony

    4. Horse Puddle

    5. Blooming Onion

    6. Crisp Coupons

    7. Smooth Moon

    8. Soft Denim

    9. Spooky Hedges

    10. Sunlit Serenade

    11. Bear Teeth

    12. Grandma Called

    13. Missing Email

    14. All Tuckered Out

    15. Breakfast BLT

    16. Call Me When You Get This

    17. Left The Car For You

    18. Burnt Toast

    19. Old Soul

    20. Girls Lunch

    21. Errands

    22. Old Halloween Candy

    23. Textbook Case

    24. Why Aren't You Dating Robert

    25. Jorts Patrol

    26. Pop Pop's Tired

    27. Lean Cuisine By the Seaside

    28. Too Many Tide Pods

    29. Up At 5

    30. Open-Face Sandwich

    31. Leftover Chicken

    32. Fine I Don't Care

    33. Oops Where's Wine

    34. Peaches and Mr. Clean

    35. Sunset Implosion

    36. Next Time Knock

    37. Is That The Good Belt?

    38. Farmer's Market Flirting

    39. Report Card Fury

    40. Barely Contained Joy

    41. Yeah Well Tell That To Your Father

    42. You're A Catch

    43. Dangerously Wobbly Table

    44. Sweet Berries And Air Conditioner Lint

    45. New Phone Sweat

    46. Pick Me Up At Subway

    47. Canned Fruit Salad

    48. Slim Jim Casserole

    49. Sticky Children

    50. Fresh Dishwashing Gloves

    51. Fuzzy Handcuffs

    52. I Love That Song

    53. Almost Muffins

    54. It's Only Root Beer

    55. Do We Need To Talk

    56. I Don't Want To Know

    57. I'll Wait Until You're Done Texting

    58. Bake at 325

    59. She Works At A Website

    60. Billy Joel Eyes

    61. Somewhat Cinnamon Rolls

    62. Your Dad And I Went To a Nice Place Last Night

    63. Salt Will Kill You

    64. Kids Are Going To Just Be Thumbs Someday

    65. Grandma Had A Nice Drive In The Car

    66. The Dog Misses You

    67. Oh My Goodness

    68. They Always Said You Were Gifted

    69. How To Train Your Dragon 2

    70. You Know Me, I'm Easy