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1. Whenever you tell somebody how long your commute is and someone from the other side of the room does this
2. You wonder "What did I do in my life to deserve this?"
3. During the drive, your palm meets your head more than three times
4. You try to pass the time by listening to audiobooks. But despite the enormous selection, you get fed up of the narrators
5. As much as you look forward to making it home from work, you might be so engrossed in the audio book or NPR's RadioLab that you'll just stay in the driveway listening to the rest of it before heading inside.
6. You rush out of the house because you know when to leave to avoid the red lights in your neighborhood.
7. You think all this time to yourself is great until you multiply the drive time by number of days in a payperiod and realize the hours of driving wastes at least a day of your life.
8. You would rather go to Mordor than experience your commute.
9. You wish you could take public transportation to your job just so you could catch up on your own life, read a book, check out Reader's Digest
10. You promise you'll go to the gym if you can telecommute. A healthy employee is a good thing!
11. During the whole drive, you wonder if the job is even worth it.
12. You're able to steer with your knees to really make that air guitar authentic.
13. Your dance moves in the car end up becoming amazing. You resolve you'll quit after the Christmas party once you've shown your coworkers the fruits of your labor.
14. You get tired of talking to yourself.
15. You turn the radio on to jam out to tunes, but get sick of it because you hear all the pop songs at least twice before making it to work.
16. So you listen to NPR to get your education on. But then the unique names and quirky voices become too much so you let out a yell of frustration.
But there's a McDonald's AND a Burger King at the next exit, which means you'll go with McDonald's because "Ew, Burger King."
Then you remember that your spouse says you usually get angry when you're hungry.
17. You go up to window number 2 (because window number 1 rarely is in operation) and you get your food.
18. Which makes you wonder, "Did my mother carry me for 9 months just so I could live a life like this?"
19. Then you get mad at the food and throw it out of the window in a crazy rage.
But when it's all over, you get to come home to a place where the bills are paid and the fridge has some food in it.
Work hard and drive safe, my fellow commuters.
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