1. Your friends sometimes make you feel less like a car owner and more like a taxi driver.
2. The second someone starts eating in your car, you know it’ll never be clean again.
Especially when they’re in the trunk with their dog. Trying to drive, you guys.
3. And you’re not usually a messy person, but your passenger seat still becomes a garbage can.
4. Your car will never tell you what’s broken because the only words it can say are “check engine.”
5. When passengers break the golden rule: “My car, my tunes.”
6. Getting your driver’s license picture taken because, no matter what you do, it always seems horrible.
7. Speed bumps and potholes seem to be conspiring to get your car into the shop again.
Leave our cars alone, you monsters!
8. Thinking the car just needed an oil change, then getting the bill and discovering you know nothing about cars.
9. The second you buy one, the less valuable it becomes.
The second it’s off the lot — poof! — used car.