A Wedding Pep Talk As Told By Jessica Lange In “American Horror Story”

On your wedding day, you are the One True Supreme.

1. So you made it to the big day.

2. You survived the high school dating world unscathed.

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3. You survived the college dating world unscathed.

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4. You even survived your bachelorette party.

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5. And you finally met the one.

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6. Now you might be a little nervous.

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7. Some old batty aunt might think your dress is too skimpy.

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8. Or one of your bridesmaids might ruin her dress.

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9. You might completely forget who some of your guests are.

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10. Or the DJ/band might play a few songs that aren’t quite to your liking.

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11. But you can’t let it bother you.

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12. Because this is YOUR weekend.

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13. And YOU are the bride.

14. So if you feel a freak out coming on…

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15. Look at yourself in the mirror…

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16. Take a deep breath…

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17. And ask yourself one question…

18. ANSWER: YOU

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19. And if all else fails…

20. There’s always the open bar.

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