1. This chair that is obviously not really a chair in hindsight.
THE SWEDISH FURNITURE ASSEMBLY INSTRUCTIONS SAID NOTHING ABOUT THIS.
2. This poor girl who will never say anything “sucks” ever again.
Or much of anything, to be honest. Oof.
3. This tricksy benchwarmer who enjoys sports beverages and crushing young dreams.
Seven-figure sports salary? Pshhhh. I’ll take the Tears of the Young and Innocent, thanks.
4. This unfortunate fellow who will never use a public restroom ever again ever.
5. This father who’s really aiming high for that World’s Best Dad mug.
6. This pancaked pedestrian who’s never going to trust the toy aisle again.
Shoulda stuck with the stuffed animals.
7. This cat who TOTALLY HAD THIS, WHAT’S WRONG WITH YOU GOSH.
8. And this short-tempered feline who, let’s face it, was looking for a fight anyway.
It ain’t easy bein’ a Cat on the Edge.
10. This tiny monkey who we didn’t even invite to brunch but helped himself anyway.
Worst part? He didn’t even throw in for tip.
11. This fellow who’s really regretting finding his roommates on Craigslist right about now.
12. This joker who wants to make sure you have a very unhappy birthday.
13. Or this would-be apologist who probably isn’t even really sorry.
Call it a hunch.
14. This smug prankster who thinks you need to get over your arachnophobia.
THIS ISN’T HELPING, CHERYL.
15. And this precocious prankee who’s gonna start sleeping with one eye open.
And an ice pack or two. Yeeowch.
And, of course, your sociopathic mad scientist grandpa.
Don’t miss Rick and Morty, Mondays at 10:30, only on Adult Swim.