1. South Beach clubs in Miami.
Level of Loaded: You wear gold chains and a diamond stud earring without any sense of irony.
2. Penthouse parties in Las Vegas.
Level of Loaded: Hotels comp your room based solely on your family name.
3. The Hamptons, to spend all of August.
Level of Loaded: Your great-great-great grandparents invented trains, and no one in your family has ever worked more than 20 hours per week.
4. Telluride, Colorado, for spa weekends.
Level of Loaded: This is what you think people mean when they talk about “going camping.”
5. The hidden beaches of Phuket, Thailand.
Level of Loaded: You don’t think it feels weird to be pulled around in a rickshaw. In fact, you wish there were more rickshaws in America.
6. 24-hour outdoor raves in Ibiza.
Level of Loaded: One time you lent Puff Daddy your hovercraft, and he repaid you with a lifetime supply of sunglasses.
7. Overwater bungalows in Bora Bora.
Level of Loaded: You were surprised to learn that not every dolphin understands commands in English.
8. Members-only resorts in St. Barts.
Level of Loaded: You hired Enya to follow you around and play atmospheric background music whenever you do anything.
9. Art galleries in St. Tropez.
Level of Loaded: You’ve never eaten a peanut butter and jelly sandwich in your entire life.
10. A spiritual retreat in the Maldives.
Level of Loaded: When you call a pizza place for a delivery, you merely whisper a secret word into the phone and within 30 minutes, a former U.S. President will show up with your order, plus he’ll tell you one state secret for free.
11. A seaside resort in Montenegro to write your autobiography.
Level of Loaded: You replace all of your body hair with incredibly thin strands of shredded famous paintings.