Schwartz’s. That is all.
Schwartz’s. That is all.
Actually, the word I use is “Bugger!” because in the US, it doesn’t mean anything to anyone except maybe some Monty Python fans, so no one is offended. Or I’ll ramp up that middle school German and say “Ach du lieber Gott!”
Oh my god, I’m itching all over just looking at that!
Just like Weird Al Yankovic’s “Mission Statement” video, but worse, because I hear these phrases and similar ones EVERY. SINGLE. DAY. And none of them set in a kick-ass Crosby, Stills, Nash, and Young musical pastiche.
I love how in #14, all the chefs look like Oliver Hardy.
This is the romance you can find in Brooklyn.
15/15 Thanks, PBS, for all those Brit shows when I was a kid! Oh, and books. Thanks, books. ;)
Maybe she hasn’t yet fully mastered how to properly balance herself with her new butt.
OK, EVERYONE’S PR TEAM IS FIRED! I mean, really, whose bright idea was this?
Hey, now, the hairstylist can actually sing.
31. Someone to spot the ladder when you need to change a light bulb. #highceilingproblems
Forget the water cannons, why isn’t anyone addressing the fact that American citizens have a 1st Amendment right to peaceably assemble? Bill of Rights. Number 1. The cops are supposed to keep an eye out and handle trouble IF it goes down, not confront citizens at the outset with military-grade weaponry like it’s an ISIS guerrilla battle. Citizens have a fundamental right to voice their concerns. I don’t understand why anyone would be OK with a demi-police state - or think that it will stop with black people, brown people, or any other people they don’t like. Think! It ain’t illegal yet! Don’t allow racism and hate to make you a frog in a pot.
The last time I skritched a cat’s head, I had symptoms for two days. Never again. And I love cats. :(
27/30 For 1 of them, I picked the British spelling because I read a lot of English books. For the other 2, I did misspell them, and of those, 1 of them is a word I misspell all the time. I hate you, “Necessary”!
So how many albums does their contract with Simon call for? 3? And then Harry’s hair goes solo? In the 2000s, wasn’t this called N’Sync?
Well, Sigmund may have been off and wrong about a lot of other things, but there is nothing like a Freudian slip, is there? SMH.
So, of course, yesterday I saw a kid wearing a t-shirt that had a drawing of a bear with bloodshot eyes and wearing a campaign hat who looked a little dizzy. On top was one word spelt out in a log-like font: Tokey.
I don’t use bar soap anymore, but when I did, it was easy enough to take the leftover sliver and meld it to a new bar. Handwritten letters are worth saving since hardly anyone writes them anymore. I’ve saved my tickets to (many) events. As if I’m going to throw out my front row ticket to R.E.M’s Green Tour at Rosemont Horizon near Chicago or my Beck’s Odelay Tour ticket from Roseland in NYC. Pfft! Not! Especially now that those venues are gone!
Ze Frank, yes, this means make that short with these two. They’re adorbs! Then you have to have, like, a NicePeter cameo. And write something good for the hot guy to do, too.
Wow, the 80s and 90s in a sartorial mish-mash. Apparently, what’s old is new again!
Real National Park/Hudson Bay blankets are extremely EXPENSIVE! If I had one that looked as nice as the one in #15, I would certainly not cut it up.
You got: Diet Dr. Extreme
You are bold and iconoclastic, but also mature and sensible. You take a lot of risks, but not without giving some thought to your decisions.
Wow, it’s like nobody bothered to put 1+1 together: if he was found and contacted because he has such an awesome portfolio, he doesn’t need Showtime for exposure, now, does he? Pay him if you want to work with him!
To be fair, that dog in 15’s Odelay cover is practically a sock already.
When I was a little girl, that “wall of sound” effect gave me shivers.
You got: Living Encyclopedia Of Music True - my fam owned a record store back in the day, and my tastes are definitely “small c” catholic.
When she wasn’t quite ready for the march on their wedding day, and Bogie asked, “Where is she?” The reply? ‘Hold it! She’s in the can!’ Love it.
Play on ‘til the end, boys!
They’re not doing this on the Upper East Side or Williamsburg, why, now…? Oh, because they know that if they attempted to pull this stunt on the UES or Williamsburg even once, they’d be arrested.
The poor man. RIP. .
Every time I see clips of him and lions, it’s as if the lions are straight-up in love with Kevin, and I think, “AWWWWWW!”
Michael Jordan vs. Muhammad Ali - Michael Jordan:
“So Cassius wants to talk about cashing checks!
I’ll school you through your bug spray, off your Broadway play, over the Japanese dude sitting on your face!
Hit nothing but net! You ain’t seen nothing yet!
You needed a movement because you’re so full of shit!” Bob Ross vs. Pablo Picasso - Bob Ross:
“Your work is melancholic, I’m painting happy little trees.
Call me Jackson Pollock, because I splatter MCs
with the voice that soothes, so let’s do this.
I twist you up like you’re a Rubik’s Cubist.” Sir Isaac Newton vs. Bill Nye - Sir Isaac Newton:
“I accelerated the mind of mankind to a higher plane of understanding
And I can calculate the weight and the size and the shape of the shadow of the mind you’re standing in!
And I will leave you with a page from a book I wrote at half of your age to rebut:
The integral sec y dy from zero to one-sixth of pi is log to base e of the square root of three times the sixty-fourth power of - WHAT?!?” (But, d’uh, c’mon, Weird Al is amazing!) Mr. T vs Mister Rogers - Mister Rogers:
“Watch what you say. Kids love me more than lunch.
I’m not the one with my face on some whack-ass Captain Crunch.
When my plan comes together, you won’t even see it coming.
I’ll chop you into four black dudes and I’ll remake Cool Runnings!”
Either he believes what he’s saying, which would make him an idiot and a fool, or he doesn’t believe what he’s saying and knows better, which would make him an opportunistic asshole. I’m thinking the latter, just like the rest of right wing radio and the right wing powers that be As long as they keep telling poor white people that we’re the problem, they’re running off with EVERYONE’S money. It’s been how many years of this sort of rhetoric? And are we any better off materially?