1. Helplessly accepting that none of your shoes will remain wearable for long.
2. And the gradual realization that you can never find socks because they're hidden in a secret stash.
3. Feeling completely torn at the dining table, when your dog looks at you with such genuinely longing eyes.
4. Heartbreak: When you're getting ready for vacation and you know that they know that you're abandoning them.
5. The despair of knowing that when you do leave, they probably won't eat for five days.
6. And the shock of coming back to find that your home has been... Um... "Rearranged."
7. Being completely, tearjerkingly proud of them when they get a trick right...
8. And laughing uncontrollably when they don't.
9. When you try to sneak their meds in with their food and feel like a certified doctor.
10. But still feel profoundly helpless and dejected to see them sick.
11. Mortification when your dog sits in the middle of a room full of guests, happily licking his/her privates.
12. And, of course, disgust when they choose to lick your face directly after.
13. When you're trying to go to bed and, all of a sudden, your BFF thinks it's playtime.
14. And of course, feeling grateful when you sleep through your alarm but always have a reliable back-up.
15. When someone tells you they're a cat person and you have to abruptly terminate an otherwise healthy friendship.
16. You're completely baffled when you know that dogs are born with the ability to swim in oceans, but yours will do anything to avoid a 10 minute bath.
17. Similarly, when they're amazingly picky about what snacks they like, but will happily drink toilet water.
18. Deathly awkwardness when you take your dog on a playdate but all the dogs want to do is sniff each other's butts.
19. Or worse...
20. When your house smells a little bit gross and you have to follow your nose on an olfactory scavenger hunt until you find the disgusting source.
22. And awkwardly having to give false compliments when someone else shows you pictures of their dog.
23. The genuine remorse and guilt you feel when you take your dog to be neutered or to get shots.
24. When you misplace something small and valuable, search your entire home, and finally find it when you walk your dog the next morning.
25. When you're driving with them in the car and are conflicted about rolling up the window because this is simultaneously SO dangerous but SOOOO cute:
26. When you're trying to yell at your dog, but they do this, and you melt into a pile of loving goop:
27. That awkward moment when you confess to your significant other that you love your dog more. Oops.
28. And when you're away from home, you miss them more than you miss your human family.
29. The joy of knowing that no matter how long you were gone...
Whether it was 2 hours or 2 years...
You will always be greeted with sheer joy when you return.
30. And the simultaneous terror of knowing that no matter what you do, you will outlive your best friend.
31. But you'll always be grateful to have shared a life with such a beautiful creature, and wouldn't trade it for the world.
