13 Surefire Ways To Ruin A First Date

For those times when you need to turn the first date into the last date.

1. Confirm your date will be picking up the check, then proceed to order the biggest steak on the menu.

2. No matter where the conversation goes, always bring it back to your house full of cats.

3. Have your mom drop you off.

4. Quote a movie every opportunity you get. Be in character. This is your moment.

5. Start every sentence with “I’m not racist, but…”

6. Drop the “L” bomb.

7. Request a LinkedIn endorsement.

8. Didn’t have time to clip your nails beforehand? Might as well do it at the dinner table.

9. Show off that awesome tattoo you got one night in college.

10. Mention the flowers you’d like to have at your wedding.

11. Every time your date talks, say, “That’s something she would say…” and stare longingly.

12. Go in for a kiss, even if they aren’t feeling it.

13. Mention how mad you are that the restaurant doesn’t have a ball pit, it said there was a ball pit on Yelp.

And reveal your deepest, darkest secret.

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