Nothing says I’m not a Mormon like releasing your beer recipe.

When you’re this good at one thing you’re bound to suck at something. And that’s cool with Ryan, just ask him right now.

Know what’s more disturbing than the incident itself? That Mitt doesn’t even remember it. This means either a) Mitt’s lying, b) Mitt did stuff like this so often that it doesn’t stand out to him, or c) the incident simply never registered in Mitt’s conscience.

JUST IN: Good Looking Person Sarah Phillips Accused of Stealing, 8 Others Involved

Then, you’re in Marina del Rehhh.

I prefer the character he plays on TV.

There’s no such thing as a free mustard drizzle.

This headline is such a win.

Alright so you want a pants commercial? Great. No problem. We’ll do something with phone booths.

It’s funny how this kid is precocious enough to nail the shtick but still too young to realize the shtick is repulsive.