1. Mao Zedong
The founding father of The People’s Republic of China was not a bad looking revolutionary. Then the hairline went north, the weight piled on and a mysterious wart appeared. I put it down to stress.
2. Joseph Stalin
Bolshevik revolutionary and leader of the Soviet Union for 30 years. Joseph perfected the whole outlaw, revolutionary, free thinker look. Then he got fat and grew out his facial hair.
3. Augusto Pinochet
Dictator of Chile and sinister looking individual. Young Pinochet or old Pinochet, those eyes have the power to disturb. Pinochet, the eyes of a hypnotist and the human rights record of a dictator.
4. Adolf Hitler
Such a poser. Hitler made the brave choice to go from one crappy moustache style to another even crappier moustache style. Apart from that, there are no major changes. At least not visible changes. Cough cough syphillis cough.
5. Saddam Hussein
Saddam Hussein presents maybe the most shocking transformation. Looking at the two pictures, you can really see the kind of toll that being a glorified mobster and murderer took on Saddams looks. By the end he had those crazy eyes that only people who have lived in a hole have.
6. Benito Mussolini
Mussolini overcame many obstacles in his life. Namely, a hairline that began to recede very early on. My theory is his hair migrated south, to just above his top lip. The moustache eventually vanished and he gained weight, probably so he’d look powerful. Instead he just ended up looking like he’s trying to decide what to have for dinner.
7. Robert Mugabe
Let’s deal with the obvious.The Hitler moustache. Mugabe counts Hitler as a role model, and if his actions weren’t proof enough of this, then the moustache is. Thinner and more groomed than Hitler’s lip warmer, the older Mugabe’s moustache resembles a leech attempting to escape his nose.
8. Muammar Gaddafi
Gaddafi’s tranformation is surprising and yet predictable. He gained weight, he started dressing crazily and went a little overboard with the cosmetic surgery. In that sense he was a true 21st century dictator. Interestingly, some people say that Gaddafi wasn’t killed, but merely assumed his second identity of Jackie Stallone on a permanent and full time basis.
9. Bashar al-Asad
The President of Syria probably dreams of returning to the innocence of his youth. A time when things were simpler and facial grooming was not yet a priority. Time has been very kind to Bashar looks-wise, ignoring the strangely long neck and elf like ears. Ah well, you can’t win ‘em all Bashar. Seriously, you can’t win them all. Take the hint.
10. Kim Jong-un
Kim Jong-un is the world’s youngest head of state and represents the freshest face in dictatoring? Dictatorialing? Its worth remembering this when he goes on one of his tantrums. He has a lot to prove and he’s not used to wearing big boy pants. If anything all of this makes him more dangerous. But who could be afraid of a face like that. I just wanna bite those cheeks off.