On a recent and incredibly ridiculous episode of Divorce Court, a guy named Nathan Sellers took his ex-girlfriend to court for, among other reasons, allegedly cheating on him with all of Wu-Tang Clan.
"She gave Wu some Tang," Sellers said.
The woman, Lia Palmquist, said she had an "amazing opportunity" when she got to go on the band's tour bus after a show. "Nothing inappropriate happened. Let me put on the record that the Wu-Tang is nothing but gentlemen."
For the record, in order to have sex with "all of Wu-Tang," the woman would've had to have been with RZA, GZA, Ghostface Killah, Method Man, Masta Killa, Inspectah Deck, Raekwon, Cappadonna, and U-God. (Ol' Dirty Bastard is probably exempt due to being dead for 10 years.)
Palmquist elaborated, "I was just hanging out all night, and it was amazing. We were not doing anything but talking. We talked a lot about politics."
She said she lost track of time and didn't leave the band until 7 a.m., but that she's not a "groupie" or a "bust-down."
"It was amazing," she added of her time with Wu.
According to a synopsis of the episode, the couple have been together for five years, after meeting at a Halloween party where Palmquist was dressed as Lil' Kim and Sellers was dressed as Hello Kitty.
"She says she wants a traditional family with kids, and she doesn't think Nathan does," it reads.
But Judge Lynn Toler seemed skeptical of the woman. "You stayed out all night, got on a tour bus with a band or a group," she said. "I mean, that's bust-down behavior, is it not?"
Ultimately, Judge Lynn determined that Palmquist would get no money in the divorce.
Here's the full episode, in which Sellers also accuses Palmquist of "loving big fat dudes" and making him wear a fat suit, and she claims he gave her bed bugs.
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Isn't love grand?