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22 Flavored Liquors That Will Make You Angry

There is no possible reason for these to exist.

1. Electricity-Flavored Vodka

Thanks but I think maybe I’ll go stick my tongue in an outlet instead.

2. Tequila-Flavored Rum

No I will not taste the smooth.

3. “Iced Cake” Vodka

4. Wasabi-Flavored Vodka

Man, and here I thought the unnecessary wasabi craze had ended with mashed potatoes.

5. “Grape Twisted” Gin

6. PB&J-Flavored Vodka

7. “Fluffed Marshmallow” Vodka

8. Bubble Gum-Flavored Vodka

9. “Torched Cherry” Rum

Which Bacardi executive walked into the room and was like “I GOT IT GUYS, let’s throw some creepy succulents and burned fruit in there and call it a day”?

10. Froot Loops-Flavored Vodka

Estimates suggest that Three Olives is responsible for 73% of all inexcusable vodka flavors currently in production.

11. Purple-Flavored Vodka

PURPLE IS NOT AND WILL NEVER BE A FLAVOR

12. Cupcake-Flavored Vodka

Equally unacceptable in all 6 available flavors, including “Verry Berry” and “Chiffon.”

13. Donut-Flavored Vodka

No self-respecting donut would want anything to do with this.

14. East Asian-Flavored Gin

It’s not that I wouldn’t drink lemongrass-infused Bombay Sapphire, it’s that everything about the branding effort here seems really culturally reductive and uncomfortable.

15. Popcorn-Flavored Vodka

16. “Wolf Berry” Rum

Don’t know what a wolfberry is but I really hope it induces this kind of behavior.

17. Pumpkin Pie-Flavored Vodka

18. “Chocolate Razberi” Vodka

19. Wedding Cake-Flavored Vodka

Do not agree to marry anyone who serves you this.

20. Swedish Fish-Flavored Vodka

21. “Spiced Root Beer” Vodka

Guess the regular root beer wasn’t spicy enough.

22. Black Cherry-Flavored Whiskey

In the immortal words of Jason Kessler, “My favorite flavor of whiskey is whiskey.”

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