Things Indie Rock Fans Hate

You know, aside from selling out.

1. You can’t seduce someone with a mixtape anymore.

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2. Carrie Brownstein is more famous for being on Portlandia and in credit card ads than for being a member of Sleater-Kinney.

Charles Sykes / AP
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3. When people think totally un-indie bands are indie.

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4. Kim Gordon and Thurston Moore are getting divorced.

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5. When a band blows up, and you go from seeing them up close at a small club to having to be in the back of some gigantic venue.

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6. When lo-fi bands go and make an over-produced album in an attempt to get on the radio.

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7. The entire Drag City catalog is not on Spotify or Rdio.

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8. That one Liz Phair album where she tried to sound like Avril Lavigne.

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9. When a new band you like gets Best New Music on Pitchfork and suddenly everyone pretends to like them.

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10. When a band you like doesn’t get Best New Music, but is sooooo close, and you’re like WTF?

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11. You can’t mail-order stuff by bands you’ve never heard from zines anymore.

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12. When you hear your favorite band at Starbucks…

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13. …or one of their songs ends up on an “indie” Starbucks compilation.

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14. Also, when bands end up on soundtracks for lame fake indie movies.

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15. It’s getting harder to find anyone who will actually buy your old Sarah Records singles on eBay.

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16. When people say that bands that sound nothing like Pavement “sound like Pavement.”

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17. Having to get to festivals super early to see all the small bands and roasting in the afternoon sun.

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18. Everyone’s digitizing all their music and people aren’t as impressed by your vinyl collection as they used to be.

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19. When people other than Stuart Murdoch sing on Belle and Sebastian songs.

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20. Major labels.

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21. Everything Death Cab for Cutie did after The Photo Album.

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22. Internet hype has made it harder to know about bands long before other people…

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23. …and nothing will ever be obscure enough ever again.

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