Politics Buzz Bill O'Reilly theorizes that if America keeps traipsing down this wayward path, gay marriage could lead to goat, duck, dolphin, and turtle marriage. I've always wanted to marry a turtle, ever since I was a very very young girl.
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I had sex with a turtle once, and boy, I'm glad I did. It was horrible. What if I hadn't, and we ended up getting married? I would have found out too late. If turtle marriage does become legal, please, for all that's holy, have sex with it first, just to be sure.
When the turtles show up at weddings, calls us Bill because then you'll have a case.
SLIPPERY SLOPE!
Michelangelo the ninja turtle was probably my first love.
I like turtles!
Turtle wedding garb will totally stimulate the economy!
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