The ABC’s Of Growing Up With A Food Allergy

Wallet? Check. Keys? Check. EpiPen? Oh wait, let me go grab it.

1. Anaphylactic

Ok, got that word out of the way.

2. Benadryl, Benadryl, Benadryl

A lifesaver when you least expect it

3. Can you eat ______?

You know the ingredients involved so I’m not even going to honor that with an answer.

4. Did you check the ingredients?

Ugh, no hold on let me look.

5. Epi-Pens — The annoying friend that always has to tag along.

Oh yeah, I forgot I had you there in my pocket. Greaaatt.

6. “Food allergies must be soo terrible. I feel soo bad for you.” - Everyone that doesn’t have any food allergies.

Cancel the pity party.

7. Geez, I’d trade my food allergy for YOUR food intolerance any day.

Without a second thought.

8. Helicopter-parenting was annoying at first but you’ve learned to welcome it.

It was a necessity.

9. Invisible: How you’ve definitely wanted to be before.

Oh no, did they really just tell everyone?

10. Joking about it makes it easier to deal with.

Laughter is the best cure

11. Killer Food: A terrible SyFy movie starring YOU.

And Bill Cosby apparently.

12. Leper Island (aka the allergy table.)

Oh alright, the graphic may be a little too depressing. But you get the idea.

13. May Contain become your least favorite two words.

NOOOOOOO

14. Never again will a meal at a restaurant be “just a meal” until the big “What’s in it?” question is asked.

Does the pasta contain _______?

15. “Oh thanks I love these”… (as you turn and throw the food away because you can’t eat it.)

You’ve known me for ten years come on!

16. Practice on an orange.

Because that’s the closest we can come to a human?

17. Quit talking about it when I’m not in the room I can still hear you!

I could make this awkward for you..

18. Random kisses become your parents’ new worst nightmare as you get older.

Choose wisely.

19. Shots!!!!!!!!

Lots of them… Well I’m not referring to these guys’ shots.

20. Trapped: The feeling you get inside your body if you’ve ever had a reaction.

Get me out of here!

21. Umbrella: Your parents were your allergen umbrella growing up.

And you love them for every second of it.

22. Very cautious…is what you are when telling some you’re interested in about your food allergy as they’re eating that food.

Oh come on.

23. Why the hell weren’t there as many kids with food allergies as there are today when I was little?

  • If all of the kids with a food allergy lived in one state, it would be the 19th largest state (by population) in the U.S.

24. X-Ray Vision: Is how you think you can approach food once you’ve lived with the allergy for awhile.

Easy there, don’t get too cocky.

25. You’d actually like my allergen-free food version that’s based on the food you’re eating. Oh wait.

Well actually.

26. Zebra: You’ll always stand out like one in a stable of horses…but you’ll be better for it.

Learn to love it

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