1. Who was this MONSTER?!
I was at a potluck today where the person who signed up for "cranberries" brought 3 bags of RAW fucking cranberries. #ThanksgivingFail
2. VOM.
My wife cooked the turkey with the bag of innards still in it #THANKSGIVINGFAIL
3. Nothing's tastier than a raw turkey that's been left out for four days straight.
#THANKSGIVINGFAIL My mom put the turkey in the oven on Monday and hoped by Thursday it would be done. In the end she forgot to turn it on.
4. Sometimes meeting an S.O. can get a little too intimate.
my father said grace and my mom sneezed and blew her dentures into the plate of a guy I just brought home to meet them #THANKSGIVINGFAIL
5. This is the absolute worst garnish.
LY I couldn't for the life of me figure out what was floating in my gravy. Furiously, I realized it was mouse turds! #thanksgivingfail
6. Blech.
A co-worker "washed" her turkey with Ivory dishwashing soap to make sure it was clean, then wondered why it was foaming. #ThanksgivingFail
7. But was the pie OK?
My bro blurted out he got married to a girl he met 2 days earlier in the middle of me eating pie, my mom flipped the table #THANKSGIVINGFAIL
8. NOOOOOOO!!!
my family just got a pet guinea pig. It got out of the cage. When my dad cut the turkey, he found a little tag surprise. #THANKSGIVINGFAIL
9. It's not Thanksgiving until you see something you don't want to.
#THANKSGIVINGFAIL my great grandfather thinks he has a sence of humor so he pretended to sneeze and went down and mooned us scariest thing
10. Seriously, you can't escape it.
My mom had taken group pictures of us on her phone and as she was swiping she accidentally showed a nude 😑😑😑 #THANKSGIVINGFAIL
11. Just when you think it can't get worse, it gets 100 times more awful.
So on thanksgiving, I got so drunk at my grandmas, farted, then shit myself at the table, ran to the bathroom, no TP #ThanksgivingFail
12. Apparently it's too late for this person.
Tonight, my friends and parents told me to attend a "Last Chance Resort" to find my husband. I'm still in my 20's. #ThanksgivingFail
13. *GAGS*
Took a giant mouthful of chicken stock thinking it was lemonade #ThanksgivingFail
14. Mmmm, sweet, saccharine gravy.
That moment when your uncle uses confectionery sugar instead of flour to make the gravy.... #ThanksgivingFail
15. Oh god no.
I think I just gave my son a whippit via the can of whipped cream he said he is tingly in his head and eyes feel weird! #ThanksgivingFail
16. Just... how? How does this even happen?
The morning started with a bang when my mom caught the fridge on fire. Turns out egg cartons are flammable. #thanksgivingfail
17. Time to NOPE outta Thanksgiving.
While my mom was mixing the stuffing with her hands she realized she lost her band-aid #THANKSGIVINGFAIL #nostuffingforme
18. Maybe that was his nickname for her!
After thanksgiving dinner everyone said what they're thankful for: I said my husband, my husband said lasagna #THANKSGIVINGFAIL
19. At least the turkey was sanitized.
Instead of hitting clear temp I hit clean oven.. No turkey that years.. Made 13 people mad.. #THANKSGIVINGFAIL
20. No one wants a sex toy for a child.
Mom teased me @ table of guests, "If u dont stop eating the rolls, u'll turn into a dildo!" -She meant Pillsbury Doughboy. #ThanksgivingFail
21. This grandma is a special blend of amazing and cruel.
Thinking it would amuse us, Grandma put a wooden Donald Duck head on the Thanksgiving cooked duck. All the kids cried. #ThanksgivingFail
22. Poor Katie.
We played taboo Thanksgiving Day. Word was stupid, sis said: What Katie is. Mom yelled "bitch!" I was 10. #ThanksgivingFail
23. There's always some kind of family fight.
My grandma's shih tzu attacked my aunt's pug and the pug had a seizure then my aunt tried to give him mouth to mouth #ThanksgivingFail
24. And finally, just be glad this horrific nightmare didn't happen to you.
Last year a million baby spiders started falling from the ceiling onto our plates. A spider laid eggs above the f'n table #ThanksgivingFail