1. Sunday: MORNING SUNSHINE JUST LONG ENOUGH TO MAKE YOU LEAVE YOUR UMBRELLA AT HOME.
2. Monday: FRIGID TEMPERATURES ALTERNATING WITH SCORCHING RAYS OF SUN. DRESS ACCORDINGLY.
3. Tuesday: ALL-ENVELOPING OVERCAST HAZE. TIME SWALLOWED UP. BRIEF LAPSE INTO SOLIPSISM POSSIBLE/LIKELY.
4. Wednesday: STEADY DELUGE. BEST TO SPEND ALL DAY LOOKING OUT THE WINDOW “WAITING FOR IT TO CLEAR UP.”
5. Thursday: SERIOUS THREAT TO RAIN. REALLY TRULY ABOUT TO RAIN. ANY MINUTE NOW. HERE IT COMES.
6. Friday: MOSTLY NICE EXCEPT FOR THAT ONE PART OF THE DAY.
In The News Today
- Budapest's main train station has opened its doors after a two-day stand-off, during which hundreds of people without a valid European Union visa weren't allowed on trains. ›
- Guatemalan President Otto Pérez Molina has resigned amid a lengthy corruption scandal that has brought his government to the brink. ›
- China's President Xi Jinping has said army personnel will be reduced by 300,000, the biggest cut to the military in almost two decades. ›