So all of your friends went out and had babies.
1. Ninety percent of the time, this means your life becomes less meaningful unless you have a baby too.
2. “OMG! Do you want to hold him/her?”
After saying, “No, it’s really OK” five times.
3. “You would feel complete if you just settled down and had a baby or eight.”
4. Wine is no longer appropriate for play dates.
6. Apparently having children is the only acceptable reason to be tired.
“You don’t know TIRED until you’ve had kids.”
7. The “work–life balance” is more important for parents.
“You can stay late since you don’t have a family at home waiting for you.”
8. Nope, poop is still not cute no matter how cute the baby is.
9. Kids make people do weird things.
10. And all the moms are like this:
11. They bring the kids EVERYWHERE.
12. You’re left to drink alone at the bar.
…or under your desk.
13. You can’t get on Facebook anymore… or Instagram.
14. They judge everything you do.
15. Picking up a six-pack loses all meaning.
16. When you say you don’t want kids:
17. When they realize you’re calling them out on BuzzFeed:
- Robert L. Dear was identified as the suspected gunman in a fatal shooting at a Planned Parenthood in Colorado Springs. ›
- At least 15 people were killed after a suicide bomber attacked a Shiite Muslim procession of hundreds of people in Nigeria. ›
- And how well do you know what happened in the news this week? Take our quiz. ›