17 Reasons Friends With Kids Are The Worst

When you have none.

So all of your friends went out and had babies.

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1. Ninety percent of the time, this means your life becomes less meaningful unless you have a baby too.

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2. “OMG! Do you want to hold him/her?”

After saying, “No, it’s really OK” five times.

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3. “You would feel complete if you just settled down and had a baby or eight.”

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But really….

I’m good.

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4. Wine is no longer appropriate for play dates.

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5. Yes, my dog IS my child.

BONUS: I don’t have to pay for college.

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6. Apparently having children is the only acceptable reason to be tired.

“You don’t know TIRED until you’ve had kids.”

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7. The “work–life balance” is more important for parents.

“You can stay late since you don’t have a family at home waiting for you.”

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8. Nope, poop is still not cute no matter how cute the baby is.

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9. Kids make people do weird things.

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10. And all the moms are like this:

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11. They bring the kids EVERYWHERE.

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12. You’re left to drink alone at the bar.

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…or under your desk.

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13. You can’t get on Facebook anymore… or Instagram.

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14. They judge everything you do.

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15. Picking up a six-pack loses all meaning.

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16. When you say you don’t want kids:

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17. When they realize you’re calling them out on BuzzFeed:

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