South Park was right. Canada is responsible for all the terrible things that happen in the world. If you want more proof, tune in all-new episodes of South Park Wednesdays at 10E/7P, only on Much.
1.Canada's (allegedly) crack-smoking mayors are stronger than the U.S.'s (allegedly) crack-smoking mayors.
2.Crime.
3.Their threatening hardcore culture.
4.Their public transportation is unnervingly polite.
5.Traffic is a stone-cold nightmare.
6.Their awesome health care makes everyone else look like jerks.
7.They have glow-in-the-dark dinosaur quarters. Now we want to throw away all our dumb, boring American money.
8.FACT: They have an OPEC-style stranglehold on the world's maple syrup supply.
9.Her.
10.Him.
11.Canada has banned the Westboro Baptist Church, confining them to America, where they'll just get crazier and crazier in their desperate need for attention.
12.That place is literally crawling with Sasquatches.
