Rachel Bilson And Kristen Bell Are Your New Mom-Friend Goals

    These women are just as awesome as you imagine them.

    Morgan Shanahan
    by Morgan Shanahan

    BuzzFeed Staff

    You know Kristen Bell. Veronica Mars, Princess Anna, BATMAN.

    CBS

    OK, not that last one, but you get the gist. A badass.

    And you know Rachel Bilson. Summer Roberts, Zoe Hart. Adorable.

    CW

    Also a badass.

    But did you know that they are really good friends?

    Macey J. Foronda / BuzzFeed

    It's true. And together they're lending their voices to No Kid Hungry, an incredible organization focused on ending childhood hunger in the United States. So they agreed to come and hang out with BuzzFeed Life one fine sunny afternoon and let us grill them on how their lives and friendship have changed now that they're both moms. (Rachel's daughter Briar Rose is a year old, while Kristen has two girls, baby Delta and 2-year-old Lincoln.)

    So, Rachel, Kristen: How did you meet?

    Macey J. Foronda / BuzzFeed

    Kristen Bell: How did we meet?

    Rachel Bilson: We’ve known each other a very long time.

    KB: But how did we meet?

    RB: Like, a long time ago, like, 15 years ago.

    KB: I was on Veronica Mars, you were…

    RB: ...on The O.C.. But how did we meet?

    KB: I dunno, fate?

    RB: Maybe we should check the internet.

    Did you notice that? They're finishing each other's sentences. Never play charades with these two.

    Has your friendship changed since you've had kids?

    Macey J. Foronda / BuzzFeed

    KB: Well, we talk a lot more about vomit.

    RB: And poop!

    KB: I mean, we talked a lot about poop and vomit before we became moms, but now we talk a lot MORE about it.

    RB: [laughs] I think you need fewer words when you're mom-friends.

    KB: Friend-friends talk about a lot of stuff, but with mom-friends you just kind of need to exchange a look to communicate.

    RB: Now we just grunt at each other in exasperation.

    KB: We take deep breaths together.

    RB: Other moms get it. They're right in it with you.

    Have your priorities shifted since your kids were born?

    Macey J. Foronda / BuzzFeed

    KB: I used to get the majority of, or a big chunk of, my self-esteem from my work and now I get about 99% of my self-esteem from taking care of my kids. I mean, I love working, but it's become much more of a creative outlet. It's not my whole life, which I know is a luxury, and I'm very grateful for.

    RB: My priorities have definitely shifted. Sleep's a priority. It doesn't exist, but it's a priority. I actually haven't worked since I had my daughter — for me, career is definitely on the back burner. It just has to be worth it to spend time away from her. It's her world, I'm just living in it is the best I can say.

    Kristen, have you gotten any of that notorious "working mom flack"?

    Macey J. Foronda / BuzzFeed

    KB: I know that there is a weird stigma about mothers who work, but I have to say working builds a really strong example for your kid. If you are focused and you are driven that’s a really good example to set. I refuse to feel guilty about it.

    RB: Well, I'm not working right now, but I really try not to surround myself with people who would make me feel guilty. It’s just maternal support across the board. Whatever your situation is, support each other.

    So how can we support each other?

    KB: I definitely have found myself instinctually intervening, like grabbing the purse of another mother if she's holding a kid, and sometimes it's appropriate and sometimes it's not appropriate.

    RB: I think because you've been in that exact situation — when you see a parent struggling, automatically your reflex is to do something to help. Be there in whatever way. Smile at the mom with the baby who is crying on the airplane.

    Rachel, what's the funniest/best/most ironic onesie your baby owns?

    Macey J. Foronda / BuzzFeed

    RB: It has Darth Vader on it, and it says “Who’s Your Daddy?”

    BuzzFeed: I mean, if it was a boy it was gonna be Luke, right?

    KB: Don’t think I didn’t try to sneak Luca in there.

    (Briar Rose's daddy is in fact Hayden Christensen, aka Star Wars' Anakin Skywalker.)

    Lucasfilm

    Kristen, your daughter brings home a sloth. Do you let her keep it?

    Macey J. Foronda / BuzzFeed

    KB: Where the fuck did you get a sloth? That’s what I’d say. You've got to start with the practicality of it. Where did you get it? No, you can't keep it because we do not support the exotic animal trade, but we will find a good home for it. That’s how I’d deal with it.

    RB: You would snuggle it.

    KB: After snuggling it, of course.

    (Something tells us Kristen would definitely snuggle it.)

    Warner Bros Television

    You guys are in the unique position of having strangers comment on your parenting choices. Do you have advice for parents who are shamed on social media for breastfeeding in public, or using a baby carrier past a certain age?

    RB: It makes me angry, personally. The negativity...


    KB:     If someone is taking the time to make a negative comment, they don't have a enough happy things in their life, so that deserves a little sympathy. So I guess I would say to those people: Come away from the dark side, because people on this side have a lot of friends and lots of sex, and it's fun, and it's more fun than just being negative to people on the internet.

    RB: Well said.

    Macey J. Foronda / BuzzFeed

    Wipes warmers: necessary or frivolous?

    RB: Absolutely not necessary. That thing is the biggest pain in my ass.

    KB: When you see how the nurses handle newborns at the hospital, when they're like earthworms, you realize babies are so durable. But for me, it was more a logistical issue — like when we're at the airport, now you have to bring the wipe warmer?

    Macey J. Foronda / BuzzFeed

    (Kristen demonstrates how nurses handle babies in the hospital.)

    Kristen: Are you prepared to sing duets of "Love Is an Open Door" with your daughters for the next six years?

    Macey J. Foronda / BuzzFeed

    KB: They don’t even know Frozen exists.


    RB:     Wait until they do, though.

    KB: I mean, we listen to Hall and Oates, so Elsa doesn’t come up that often. I might be the one American with children who doesn’t have Frozen on a loop.

    Macey J. Foronda / BuzzFeed

    Do you have a favorite children's book?

    KB: The Great Paper Caper. It's so cute. There's a bear who is chopping down all the trees to make paper for his paper airplane competition. That or Quackenstein which is about a crotchety old duck who adopts a baby platypus.

    RB: See, you're at the age where she's doing fun stories, I'm still doing Brown Bear, Brown Bear. But I actually love children's books just for myself. I'm obsessed with them. There's this one book — My Buddy Slug — it's the best story about friendship. Everyone should read that book.

    How do you select the causes that you devote your time to?

    Macey J. Foronda / BuzzFeed

    KB: I try to just steer with my gut, and when I hear about a cause that I know is vetted and important, and most of all, solvable, like No Kid Hungry, I want to jump on board. One in five kids in the U.S. struggle with hunger. Fifty per cent of the kids who qualify for some level of poverty-line food assistance don't receive it because there's an implementation problem, but No Kid Hungry knows how to get the food to those kids. So we were like, where do we need to drop off the food? Or y'know, send us to BuzzFeed and we'll talk about it. What do we need to do?

    RB: Absolutely, I couldn't imagine not being able to feed my child. Having a child makes it that much more real, but childhood hunger has always been a problem, and it needs attention. That's why I want to give it a voice.

    To learn more about No Kid Hungry and how you can help fight childhood hunger in the United States, visit NoKidHungry.org.

    This interview has been edited for length and clarity.