1. I used to go fishing with Skrillex but he kept dropping the bass.
2. It’s not that the man couldn’t juggle, it’s just that he didn’t have the balls to do it.
3. The person who invented the door knocker won the No-Bell Prize.
4. When I get naked in the bathroom, the shower usually gets turned on.
5. The store keeps calling me to come back, but all I wanted was one night-stand.
6. I couldn’t figure out how to fasten my seat-belt. Then it clicked.
7. I’m going to make Wi-Fi my Valentine: we have such a connection!
8. I couldn’t remember how to throw a boomerang, but it came back to me.
9. Did you hear about the guy who got hit in the head with a can of soda? He’s lucky it was a soft drink.