16 Very Important Questions For Eva Mendes

We want answers.

1. Do you get pleasure from other people’s pain?

2. No really, does it get you off?!

3. Is it intentional? You know what you’re doing, right?

I’ll help you out if you don’t already know…

You’re fucking RUINING OUR LIVES.

4. Does George even like you?

5. Seriously, what the fuck is up with the skull?!

6. Do you really consider Ryan to be an accessory?

7. Must you insist on rubbing salt in my raw wounds?

8. POUR BLEACH IN MY EYES?!

HA HA NO. THIS IS NOT A JOKE.

9. Do you think we don’t get it? That we don’t see what you’re doing? Your plan?

WE GET IT. YOU AND RYAN WORK TOGETHER. WHOOP-DEE FUCKING DOO!

10. Do you know what it feels like to have a million knives stabbed simultaneously into your beating heart?

11. Can you imagine what the feels like, Eva? Imagine it. Because that’s how we feel. That’s what you’re doing.

IT’S LIKE BEING PUNCHED IN THE FACE WITH A FISTFUL OF NEEDLES. IT HURTS. IT REALLY FUCKING HURTS.

12. New Year’s Eve Lovebirds?

13. Thai Twosome?

14. Romantic strolls through a cemetery in Paris?

15. NIAGARA FUCKING FALLS??!?!?!?!?!?!

ENOUGH.

STOP THE BLEEDING.

*BARFS*

*THROWS A TANTRUM*

16. HAVEN’T YOU HEARD OF SHARING?

Jason Merritt / Getty Images

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