1. The first thing you have to do at Cabela’s is admire the giant statue of a Native American rowing a settler.
Wow, what a work of art.
2. Then you check in your gun.
3. Next you’re greeted by a giant mountain of dead animals.
A waterfall runs through it.
4. Then find the bird with a wig.
5. Check out some antelopes being eaten by a lion.
6. Look at inner tubes.
7. See the moose that was just killed by 2 bears.
8. More dead animals.
9. Look at people looking at more dead animals.
10. Polar bears (dead).
11. Check out the other side of the mountain of dead animals which is basically a whole other mountain of dead animals.
12. Cold dead animals.
13. Think about buying candy. Look at more dead animals.
14. Check out the latest in camo couture.
15. Look at an entire room devoted to dead deer.
16. Find one of those crazy camo suits you only see on TV.
17. Truly admire it.
18. Think about buying it.
19. Decide you’ll never wear it. Regret buying it later.
20. Try on more clothes.
21. Look at the antelope being eaten by two crocodiles.
22. Some more dead animals.
23. Okay Bye!
FYI, we’re on a road trip to Bonnaroo. See all the stuff we’ve stopped at a long the way here!