1. Attn. Attn. #teamthirst and people who take great pleasure in spotting a rogue celebrity bulge, as BuzzFeed’s resident dick detective and penis P.I. I am here to bring you the truth and sometimes that truth isn’t always what you want it to be.
2. Earlier this week, The Gaily Grind posted a significantly hefty picture of Nick Jonas’ bulge.
3. I was immediately in awe, in all my years as the bulge bloodhound it’s quite rare to see bulge quite this fleshy.
4. But that’s when I knew something was up. I did some research, aka Google searches and came up with the receipts.
5. After some conclusive staring, it appears that Nick Jonas’ bulge isn’t that big.
6. Don’t get me wrong, we still have dick definition, but it’s not that crystal cocking clear.
7. This bulge has been…
8. But who cares, he was more of an ass guy anway.
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