Man Tries To Make A Baby With A Horse, Obviously Fails

Dear God.

1. Introducing Andrew Mendoza.

Andrew was arrested in Texas for having sex with a horse. That’s bad and all, but this account is far more horrifying.

Here’s what he told the Wharton County Sheriff’s Office:

“I was trying to make the horse have a baby. I was thinking it would have a horseman baby. I ain’t going to lie, I blew a nut in the horse. I then got off the bucket and put my clothes back on and left. I promise that I have not been back over to the horse since that time.”

In case you missed it…

The end. Bye humanity!

Check out more articles on BuzzFeed.com!

          
    Hot Buzz

    What’s The Most Awkward Housemate Situation You’ve Been In?

    collection

    What Has Restored Your Faith In Humanity In 2014?

    collection
    Now Buzzing