30 Ways Growing Up With “Seinfeld” Totally Messed You Up

You are who you are because of Seinfeld. Sorry.

30. You’re always talking about people behind their backs.

ID: 1327196

29. You are pathetic, and you don’t even care, even though you probably should.

ID: 1327124

28. You are always judging couples in public.

ID: 1341350

27. You basically hate everyone who is in a happy relationship.

ID: 1341186

26. You are constantly using this excuse.

ID: 1327115

25. You have a love–hate relationship with vending machines.

ID: 1330007

24. You take too many naps.

ID: 1327117

23. Not eating is never an option. If you don’t eat, you’re angry.

ID: 1327118

22. Food and sex = life.

ID: 1341381

21. You’re always questioning other people’s fashion choices.

ID: 1327119

Bras as tops? Nope!

ID: 1327121

Capes? Nope!

ID: 1327225

20. You beat the shit out of ketchup bottles.

ID: 1329294

19. Alcohol is life.

ID: 1327122

18. You are not you without it.

ID: 1330106

17. This is why you drink in public.

ID: 1341704

16. You understand the timeless art of seduction.

ID: 1327880

15. You’re living a lie or two or 20.

ID: 1327128

14. You are a slob.

ID: 1328968

13. You constantly wonder what it’s like to be normal.

ID: 1328987

12. You love cheese almost a little too much.

ID: 1329299

11. You have at one time or other thought how cool it would be to open your own Moviefone business.

ID: 1329320

10. You end relationships over things like pie.

ID: 1341104

9. You don’t give a shit about what people think about you in public.

ID: 1341127

8. You look annoyed all the time on purpose.

ID: 1341154

7. Your ultimate dream job: bagel technician.

ID: 1341190

6. You don’t go outside nearly enough.

ID: 1341447

5. You realize that being a better you takes time. One small step at a time.

ID: 1341478

4. You are really good at fake talking.

ID: 1341511

3. You wear your emotions on your sleeve.

ID: 1341512

2. You are, in general, sick of people.

ID: 1341727

1. And most importantly, you’ll never buy a puffy jacket because you know everyone will punch you when you wear it.

ID: 1341541

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