1. Buttercup is the most well-known sloth in the world. She has been on countless Animal Planet and Discovery Channel specials. She is a sloth legend. THE sloth legend. Also the current world’s oldest known living sloth.
2. She was the founding member of the Sloth Sanctuary of Costa Rica…
3. …and maintains residency in a basket 24/7. She never leaves the basket. Really, the basket is her life.
4. BuzzFeed was granted special access to the elusive sloth-teuse and we were able to get a rare insight into what it’s like being the world’s most famous sloth.
5. 7:00 a.m.: Buttercup slowly comes to life. She awakens. Buttercup waits (kind of) patiently for her first delivery of leafy greens. She motions to the help.
6. 7:05 a.m.: Buttercup turns around. She is still sleepy. “My greens. My greens, please.” She yells.
7. 7:10 a.m.: Her greens are delivered. She begins her beauty regime. Buttercup exfoliates her sloth face.
8. 7:12 a.m.: Exfoliation is exhausting. Beauty is so boring. She sleeps.
9. 8:05 a.m.: Buttercup suddenly awakes with a confused expression on her face. She overslept, again. Shit. Her adoring masses of loyal fans are coming soon.
10. 8:06 a.m.: Buttercup resumes her beauty regime.
11. 8:10 a.m.: Buttercup stops for a quick nosh. Everything she eats is organic. “It’s good for my skin and mood,” she says.
12. 8:20 a.m.: Buttercup stops for another nap. She sleeps kind of a lot.
13. 8:30 a.m.: Buttercup wakes up and eats more leaves. They keep her trim and fit. It’s hard being in the public eye all the time.
14. 9:00 a.m.: Buttercup sits on a perch and motions to her help that she’s ready.
15. 10:01 a.m.: Buttercup looks toward her fans. She loves her fans.
16. 10:02 a.m: Last-minute touches on her nails. She’s ready for her fans.
17. 10:07 a.m.: Buttercup whispers, “Hi, fans.”
18. 10:10 a.m: Face on. Nails done. It’s showtime.
And by showtime, she means just sit there and be a sloth. She compares herself to the likes of Kim Kardashian and Elizabeth Taylor. Her life is perfect parts glamour and exposé.
19. 10:11 a.m: “Come on now, fans. Don’t be shy. I don’t really bite. I’m a sloth.”
20. 10:12 a.m: Buttercup poses for her fans.
21. 10:20 a.m.: Buttercup announces she’s had enough from said fans.
22. 10:25 a.m.: Buttercup turns around for a nap.
23. 10:26 a.m.: She screams back at her fans. “I love you fans! I am here because of you, fans!”
24. 11:45 a.m.: Buttercup awakes with a burst of vigor. She slept through some fan visits. Her bad.
25. 11:49 a.m.: Buttercup begins grooming.
“It’s funny because people don’t realize what goes into being Buttercup. It’s a full-time job!”
26. 11:52 a.m.: She exfoliates her arms. Her arms are her signature body part. She compares them to J.Lo’s “booty.” “It’s what people come to see, ” she says.
27. 12:22 p.m.: Buttercup takes a selfie for her many millions of Instagram followers. It’s how she keeps in touch with her people. “Costa Rica can be so isolating, but I love it,” she says.
28. 12:30 p.m.: More fans arrive. Buttercup turns to greet them.
29. 12:45 p.m.: It’s a shitshow. Bulbs flashing. People shouting. Buttercup poses through the chaos.
30. This lasts for a solid hour and a half.
31. 3:30 p.m.: The chaos is over for now. Buttercup moves to her top lair. She calls it her “penthouse.” She smiles.
32. 3:45 p.m.: Last call! Day is almost up. Buttercup is exhausted.
33. 4:05 p.m.: Buttercup finishes her day with a couple of late fans. They apologize. She doesn’t mind.
34. 4:30 p.m.: Buttercup gets a well-deserved nap before dinner.
35. 5:45 p.m.: Dinner. More leaves. She reveals she’s on a “cleanse.”
36. 5:55 p.m.: Buttercup does a quick photo shoot for a sloth-interest magazine based out of Honduras.
37. 6:00 p.m.: Buttercup is sleeping. Again.
38. 7:15 p.m.: Buttercup is still sleeping.
39. 7:30 p.m.: Buttercup wakes up to eat some more leaves. Her metabolism is slow. It’s a constant battle, she says.
40. 8:00 p.m.: It’s getting dark. Buttercup shows me the manicure she got last week. It’s very nice.
41. 8:35 p.m.: Buttercup begins her pre-bed ritual with stretching. “Staying lose is key. I’m a sloth.” We laugh.
42. 9:00 p.m.: A last-minute snack to get her through the night.
43. 10:00 p.m.: Buttercup yawns. She’s out. Another successful day of slothing. When I asked her what keeps her going she goes on about her fans: “My fans. I do it for my fans.”
Such a class act.
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