1. "When are you shaving that?"
2. "Are you allowed near schools or playgrounds?"
3. "Dad?"
4. "Where's the rest of your beard?"
5. "Are you a cop?"
6. "Do you drive a van?"
7. "Are you in porn?"
8. "Does it itch?"
9. "So is this an ironic thing?"
10. "Do you get food stuck in it?"
11. "What actually is a mustache ride?"
12. "Does it tickle?"
13. "Do you think I could pull one off?"
14. "How long have you been growing it?"
15. "Do you live in [insert hipster neighborhood]?"
16. "Do you ever get laid?"
17. "Aren't you embarrassed?"
18. "How do people take you seriously?"
Bitch, please.
Martin Luther King Jr & Albert Einstein — Mustache Owners
19. "But seriously, why?"
