Michael Cole Suffers From Anterograde Amnesia

Kayfabe (Google it) article regarding the wellbeing of WWE employee, Michael Cole

46 year old, World Wrestling Entertainment commentator and broadcaster, Michael Cole, has been admitted to a local medical facility for suspected anterograde amnesia.

Sources confirm the news and suspect this may be due to an incident involving being assaulted by the contents of a branded condiments bottle to his temporal cortex.

The first signs of suspected anterograde amnesia were on a recent WWE Monday Night Raw live broadcast where, Cole, hypothesised during John Cena’s opening match against Erick Rowan, of the Wyatt Family, “when have you ever seen John Cena manhandled this way?”

This conjecture set alarm bells ringing as Cole had previously made same comments on several occasions in relation to Cena’s matches against such WWE superstars as Big Show, Kane, Great Khali, Ryback, Sheamus, Brock Lesnar, Mark Henry, amongst a ridiculous amount of other large WWE superstars who actually HAVE “manhandled Cena that way” and been commentated on by Cole in the past years.

Footage of Cole’s repeat utterances are available to listen to on the WWE Network, which can be accessed via the WWE App, a comment that Cole has made on, at last count, 354,987,543 times on a WWE broadcast. Further highlighting his suspected anterograde amnesia.

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