1. This cat is sick and tired of being slung around like a sack of potatoes.
2. And this guy, who’d rather hide in a Fisher Price oven than face another round of dress-up, is quietly waiting for the kid to go to bed so he can watch TV in peace..
3. This cat feels like being held down and drooled on is a bit too much to take at this point.
4. And this guy resents being tossed aside with the inanimate objects. He’s so much more than a stuffed toy! He’ll show them!!
5. This cat is not happy about the paper hat. Not happy at all, thank you very much.
6. And this kitten dreams of the day he’ll be given the freedom to roam the house free, far away from those who shake him around like he’s their plaything.
7. And this cat just needs the kid to stop running around for just One. Darn. Minute. Please.
8. She didn’t think it would come to this, swinging high above the earth, detained by a pudgy blonde thing. And yet, here she was. Here she was.
9. On the count of three, this guy is ready to take down his nemesis, show her who’s boss, ONCE AND FOR ALL.
10. This guy really isn’t comfortable being left alone with the baby. What if it wakes up? What if it.. CRIES? This is too much responsibility!
11. She wants you to know that the empty praise isn’t helping the kid be a better artist. He’s just not that good, and it’s time to admit it.
12. This cat is in her happy place, somewhere far away from enthusiastic little girls that keep her contorted into weird poses for the sake of a photo op.
13. She is acutely aware that this moment, the moment at which she cannot even move her own arms, is a low point. A humiliating, concerning low point. And yet, what can she do?
In The News Today