1. Adam Roberts of Godfrey, IL, age 24
Mr. Roberts was found stealing property from storage facilities and selling the items. Illinois police are asking people if they bought any of the stolen items. While sometimes this sort of thing is tough for people to remember, the inclusion of a skull face tattoo tends to make the transaction a bit more memorable.
2. Mercella Hernandez of Arizona
Arrested for parole violation, Ms. Hernandez refused to show anything but her lovely locks for her mug shot.
3. James Denham Watson of Arlington, VA
Mr. Watson is facing charges of malicious wounding after attacking his roommate when he woke up to find genitals drawn on his face. The roommate ended up having to be hospitalized. If his booking photo is any indication, this guy found his retaliation to be the appropriate response to his facial adornment.
4. Ronaldo Silva of Brazil, age 39
Ronaldo managed to sneak past the guards in Penedo Prison where he was residing for drug trafficking charges. He made it all the way to a bus stop, only to be found out when a cop noticed he wasn’t so great at walking in heels.
5. Name Unknown, Location Unknown
While there’s no surrounding information for this one, we can deduce one thing: he knew what he was getting himself into since he is, in fact, the law that brought him there.
6. Name Unknown, Location Unknown
Another anonymous individual arrested for reasons we’re not aware of. I’m taking it upon myself to assume that he might have another puzzle for you.
7. Kelley Gibson of Fort Wayne, Indiana
This is Mr. Gibson’s 48th arrest for… you guessed it…. huffing paint.
8. Felipe De Jesus Saldana of Polk County, Iowa, age 25
This is Felipe’s second DUI, but that doesn’t stop him from feeling soulful about the matter. I’m almost too moved emotionally by his sensual staring into my eyes to laugh, and yet…
9. Eric Butkiewicz of Miami Beach, FL
This guy was arrested for loving America just a little too much. No, just kidding, that’s not the reason at all. He was selling Xanax in a club on July fourth.
10. Name Unknown, Orange County
This fine young lady was arrested for disorderly intoxication… in case you couldn’t already guess.
11. Cesar Sanchez of Atlanta, GA, age 37
Mr. Sanchez was partying at a club, doing his thang, dressed as a clown (this club is located in a shopping mall, let it be known). Someone decided to ruin his fun by calling the cops saying that he was a “suspicious person.” Turns out Cesar was on warrant for “battery with visible harm” so he was taken to jail.