28 Life-Changing Things That Happen When 5SOS Performs At The "Today" Show

5 Seconds Of Summer, more like 5 Seconds Of GIVE ME YOUR NUMBER.

FACTS: 5SOS stands for 5 Seconds of Summer. They are a band from Australia. There are four of them. They are all adorable. They just released their first full-length album. They played the “Today” Show, and all of the following things happened for real:

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1. First of all, Calum and Ashton took this picture backstage, before anything even started, changing lives by the mere truth of their existence.

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2. Then they walked onstage, and their graceful, manly armpits looked out onto the world, filling places of darkness with light.

Charles Sykes/Invision / AP
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3. They took this selfie with Matt Lauer whose very presence is now blessed by their medicinal youth, his skin lifted by its mere proximity to their angelic faces.

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4. Then Michael began strumming his guitar with the grace of a young lover plucking petals from a supple rose.

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5. And Luke’s mouth ever-so-slightly grazed the side of his microphone as he filled the air with sweet, sweet love.

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6. And Ashton and Ashton’s floppy hair and Ashton’s arm and Ashton’s side-boob attacked these drums with such ferocity, an angel somewhere trembled on his bed of cloud.

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7. And then Calum swirled his eyebrows, and I felt the earth physically shift beneath my feet as they swished across his face.

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8. Then they all started performing as one, and it felt like a warm, lingering hug, squeezing the very breath from my lungs.

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9. There was every sweet moment Ashton’s beautiful arms rose about his floppy head.

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10. Every strapping bang of the drums.

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11. There was every tiny twitch of Luke’s lips.

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12. There was the moment Ashton looked lustily at the back of Luke’s head, burning with passion.

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13. There was the moment Calum’s sweet, tender eyes looked out into the crowd and his beauty brought a single tear to my eye.

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14. There was everything happening in and around Ashton’s armpit.

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15. There was the moment Luke’s legs were as twisted as my heart strings.

Charles Sykes/Invision / AP
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16. The moment they put their beautiful legs atop this box, which represents the container of my emotions.

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17. There was the moment Calum presented his beautiful backside to Luke, and my knees buckled.

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18. There was basically all of Calum’s arm-raising, skinny-jean-wearing, tear-inducing beauty.

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19. And all of Luke’s gaping glory.

Charles Sykes/Invision / AP
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20. And all of Michael’s flailing grace.

Charles Sykes/Invision / AP
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21. And all of Ashton’s manly drum-beating, heart-stopping charm.

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22. There was this face.

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23. These beautiful fingers.

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24. And this smile.

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25. And these arms.

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26. And this face.

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27. And this everything.

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28. And basically every single blesséd moment of their life-changing, sob-inducing existence.

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