11 Things I Learned At A Paramore Concert

Spoiler: There’s a lot of confetti involved.

1. When performing, it is very important to point at your audience. Like, really important.

So important.

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Extremely important.

How else will people know you’re in the band? Other than being on stage and playing an instrument and stuff.

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If you are not pointing you are basically not a real musician.

And no one will like you, etc.

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2. Provide many platformed island thingies to jump off of.

Jason DeCrow / AP

Because really, what is live music without jumping off of shit?

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3. Coloring your hair to look like fire is cheaper than getting pyrotechnics.

Also it looks awesome.

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Hair fire!

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4. Never underestimate the power of powder paint.

Always. It’s not kinda gross/dirty if it’s NEON PINK.

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5. When that fails, CONFETTI!!

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A lot of confetti. Prefably, confetti that matches the fiery persona of your band.

Yes. More hair jokes.

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In fact, you need confetti.

Not an option.

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Literally everyone loves confetti.

It makes up for the fact that your sweaty body is being pushed up against the metal barricade and also everyone else’s sweaty body.

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6. If you’re a fan and want to get noticed, prepare to get married.

Paramore’s no longer exclusively for tween girls! A gentleman recently proposed to his girlfriend during “The Only Exception” at a show in Boston. But this has also happened in Hawaii and London and all over so, you know. It’s a Paramore thing.

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7. And duh, there’s no way she’ll say no.

Because Paramore is about love. Amore = love. We’re just going to ignore the fact that the prefix par- means beside/beyond/resembling/etc. and that “paramour” means secret lover. There is literally nothing less secret than purposing in front of a billion screaming fans but I digress. This rules.

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8. No shame in bringing mom.

Mom is probably going to have as much fun as you, or possibly more. Probably more.

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9. Wear the uniform.

The uniform, like everything else that is wonderful in this world, is Paramore. And probably “under 21” wristbands. Remember the days of huge sharpie X’s? Sigh.

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10. Crowd surfing requires perfect form.

Or being a tween so security guards can easily carry you over the barricade. Idk. But this girl is doing a really good job. I mean, no one is grabbing her inappropriately, she has one free hand extended for the ultimate in rock ‘n’ roll. Like I said, it’s all in the form.

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11. It’s okay to deface your country’s flag, if only with Paramore lyrics.

You will be rewarded with a good time and will be forever immortalized as “flag guy.” Love you, flag guy.

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