1. Peeping Calum Pillow
Imagine opening your eyes in the morning, rolling over, and seeing this classic Cal face staring back at you. You need that in your life.
$13.99. Buy it here.
2. Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles Shower Curtain
If you’re not jumping into a shower cloaked by this amazing TMNT curtain every morning then what are you even doing with your life?
$26.99. Buy it here.
3. “Hi or Hey” Frame
This is the perfect piece of art to inspire you to keep on keeping on. 5SOS were just little, shaggy-haired bitties back when the infamous “hi or hey” incident happened. Now, they have their own record label called Hi or Hey Records. The lesson here is: Even a supposed mistake can turn into something amazing.
$13. Buy it here.
4. Michael & Daniel Phone Case
The greatest love story of this century isn’t Noah and Allie or Gus and Hazel. It’s Michael Clifford & Daniel the lion. This amazing phone case immortalizes that beautiful bond by imagining them riding off into the snow-capped abyss together. Simply stunning work.
$15. Buy it here.
5. Galaxy-Printed Toms
Business in the front, party in the back.
$55. Buy it here.
6. Luke Greeting Card
When you have something to say but you don’t know how to say it, just send a card with Luke’s face on it. Whoever you gave it to will be so distracted by his adorable pink cheeks and perfectly coiffed hair, that your message on the inside won’t actually matter that much.
$3.99. Buy it here.
7. Temporary Tattoos
This is for the 5SOS fan who wants to go back to school proving he or she is a bada$$, but doesn’t want to make the permanent commitment yet.
$3.50. Buy it here.
8. Hair Bow (or bow tie, possibly)
You’ll need this to tame bed hair on days when you’re too lazy to put in actual effort.
$4.50. Buy it here.
9. Blushing Calum Brooch
Cal’s eyebrow game is STRONG, you guys. So strong that he’s getting embarrassed just thinking about it, making his adorable little puffy cheeks all flushy and pink. Immortalizing that in a brooch is pure genius.
$6.99. Buy it here.
10. “Punk Rock Hoodie”
A super comfy 5SOS hoodie to stay warm in on chilly autumn days? Yes, thank you, more please.
$33.99. Buy it here.
11. Mason Jars
For the ~hipster~ 5SOS fans of the world, there are now swanky mason jars to make you feel like a fancy fangirl while you sip on your cucumber water.
$11. Buy it here.
12. This Boy-Blocking LOL Shirt
This gem is for any member of the Fam who knows no boy in your class will ever measure up to Ashton (or whoever your fave member is—there are tons of these shirts for each guy!). When talking to boys is the straight-up worst because all you can think about is how they’ll never be as cute or funny or talented as Ash, this is what you’re saying in your head. Might as well put it on a shirt, too.
$16. Buy it here.
13. Stuffed Honk Characters
Ever wondered what Michael, Calum, Luke, and Ashton would look like as miniature stuffed geese? Of course you have! These honk characters—which the artist says were designed based on their “She Looks So Perfect” single cover art—are adorable and entirely necessary.
$42.55 for the set. Buy it here.
14. Heart-Shaped Necklace
For the single 5SOS fans, this Luke locket is a must-have for two reasons: 1) It will remind you that even though you’re technically boyfriend-less IRL, Luke is always (literally) hanging with you, and 2) THAT FACE.
$8. Buy it here.
15. This Weird Shirt
Not entirely sure what’s going on here, to be honest. They appear to be levitating, which is pretty much how it feels to be in love with 5SOS—like your soul is leaving your body and flying to heaven. Whatever the case may be, 5SOS are weird dudes (in the best way possible), and this shirt is super weird (also in the best way possible), so it’s going on the shopping list.
$15.99. Buy it here.
16. Tweet Stickers
It is a truth universally acknowledged that 5SOS are expert tweeters. This pack of stickers celebrates some of their very best words of wisdom, which would make awesome locker magnets, binder decorations, or mirror decals for when you need a good laugh.
Currently unavailable, but you can check back for them here.
17. Floral Tote Bag
This one’s a no-brainer. It’s a super cute bag. You’ll need it to carry books and stuff in. Duh.
$14. Buy it here.
18. “Keep C.A.L.M.” Mug
Praise heavens for 5SOS for finally putting a new spin on all those boring, unoriginal “keep calm” products. We all know that “C.A.L.M.” as an acronym for our fave boys’ names is much more soothing to think about. Drinking your morning coffee or tea out of this mug will set the best mood for your entire day.
$15.99. Buy it here.
19. Smash Painting
This acrylic painting of Ashton’s superhero alter ego, Smash, will remind you to have a SUPER day every day. Plus, his crossed eyes and stray eyebrow hair are too goofy and precious to resist.
$12. Buy it here.
20. “Good Girls Are Bad Girls” Underwear
You bet your butt you need these undies for those days you want to feel all sultry and divalicious. You’ll look so perfect standing there, in these Etsy-made underwear. Pro tip: Make sure no one in your family sees these in your laundry. Kinda awkward if you don’t know they’re lyrics?
$13. Buy it here.
21. “Here’s to Teenage Memories” Painting
You need this canvas painting with “Kiss Me Kiss Me” lyrics on your wall, pronto, to remind you that being a teen is exciting and rad and wild, and you need to make it as memorable as possible.
$15. Buy it here.
22. Watermelon-Eating Luke Shirt
This is a shirt with Luke noshing on a watermelon. I shouldn’t have to explain why this is a necessary article of clothing to have on your body.
$12.99. Buy it here.
23. Six Pack of Buttons
These cute little buttons are perfect for dressing up a backpack, purse, hoodie, or basically anything else you can stick a needle into.
$9. Buy it here.
24. Michael’s Hairstyles Tee
Whether they admit it or not, every 5SOS fan has a favorite Michael hairstyle. Maybe you dug the skunk stripe, or maybe you were more of a slime green kinda gal. Doesn’t matter, because with this shirt, you can sport all your faves. Good thing it’s white because you’ll probs need the blank space to draw on all the rest of the looks he’s guaranteed to experiment with.
$18. Buy it here.
25. Collage iPhone Case
OK, so there are quite literally hundreds of 5SOS phone cases on Etsy for your browsing pleasure. But this one gets double points because Luke is taking a mirror selfie and Ashton is wearing drop-dead sexy glasses.
$.20- 3. Buy it here.