So yeah, Leo didn't win an Oscar for, like, the 756th time.
And yes, it was sad.
Heartbreaking even. Just look at his face when he loses. Even Jonah in the back looks to his friend to make sure he hasn't crumbled into a ball of tears.
But does he even really NEED an Oscar? No, because he's already a golden statue himself.
I mean, just look at his perfectly groomed goatee and brushed back hair.
And his wonderfully furrowed brows.
And chiseled side profile.
He's ALREADY A WINNER.
Are you seeing what I'm seeing???!!!!?!?
Seriously though, he literally is a tanned god sent from heaven.
And he has like 1,000 other awards besides a stupid Oscar.
Like the award for best impression of Jack Nicholson:
And for best pose with a swan:
And he clearly is the winner for best selfie with 2 Chainz:
He's also won the most graceful fall while being chased by a penguin award:
The greatest water propeller man award...
The absolute best tennis player trophy:
Also, the No. 1 snorkler in Hollywood award.
And we can't forget about the award for an actor that most closely resembles Judy Zipper, which is like WAY more important than an Academy Award.
You see, he doesn't even need a little statue because he has HIMSELF.
His flawless self.
He attracts the golden rays of the sunlight just by being him.
SO KEEP PARTYING, LEO.
Because to me, you are perfect.
And you'll get them next time.
But if not, then WHATEVER.
