1. Denise Richards and Charlie Sheen welcomed their first daughter.
Spoiler alert: They got divorced.
2. Janet Jackson showed the world her boob.
Spoiler alert: Nothing was this exciting until Beyoncé took the stage last year.
4. …because Jessica was keeping Nick happy.
Spoiler alert: Guess not actually? They split 5 months later.
6. But then they weren’t on the rocks anymore.
Spoiler alert: They actually might have been ~on the rocks~.
7. Bennifer II rumors began.
Spoiler alert: They were dating!! AND STILL ARE!!!
8. THESE TEENS GOT WILD.
Spoiler alert: They grew up and are no longer teens. (Some are still kinda wild though).
9. Jude Law was the sexiest man alive.
Spiler alert: still very, very sexy, just now with less hair.
12. Ok, but they were definitely still together and happy.
Spoiler alert: NO THEY WEREN’T.
14. Angelina was actually back with Billy Bob Thornton.
Spoiler alert: No actually.
16. …and was she READY FOR JAIL???
Spoiler alert: Heck yeah she was.
18. …but actually maybe they weren’t because Bill Rancic was the “new guy.”
Spoiler alert: Nope, he wasn’t. He ended up with Guiliana Rancic!
19. Kirstie Alley had a dilemma.
Spoiler alert: She’s alright. And Brad and Jen are not adopting.
20. Randy Jackson lost a lot of weight!
Spoiler alert: He really did, good for him!
21. Drew became new.
Spiler alert: Whatever this means, I guess it happened. Also, cute pic of John Travolta and Tom Cruise as a bonus.
22. Sara Jessica Parker said goodbye to Sex And The City.
Spoiler alert: But not really, movies galore!!!
23. Gwyneth and Chris welcomed their first child.
Spoiler alert: They just consiouscly uncoupled.
25. And then had baby dillemas.
Spoiler alert: No baby. No more marriage.