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The 37 Wisest Things Michael Scott Ever Said

Michael Scott wasn’t just a man, he was a philosophical man. And without realizing, he taught us so much.

1. He spoke wisdom about his theory of leadership…

2. On superstition:

3. And on morning smells:

4. His knowledge went even further, though, to pimples…

5. The correlation between butt size and heart size:

8. He was a pioneer in defining words…

9. And his thoughts on freaking:

11. And spoke these words about equality…

12. Because really, we’re all the same…

14. And found the deeper meaning of everyday things.

15. His words were profound, like Socrates.

16. He could admit his faults in the purest of ways…

17. But his confidence was awe-inspiring.

18. He was a leader for men.

19. And knew more about human relationships than those who study it.

22. Like what the world would be like if a baby ruled it.

23. And of the goodness of porn.

24. He taught us what friendship really consists of…

25. That pedophiles just CANNOT WIN AGAIN.

26. And that the movie Willy Wonka is a thing that doesn’t exist.

27. He enlightened us about joke-telling…

28. The uplifting effects of ice cream…

30. And used a reasonable analogy to prove grief can be good.

31. So remember, Michael was a wise, wise man.

32. He taught us it aint no thang to poop…

33. You should never do anything, ever.

34. But if you do, do these three things:

35. And that you can’t force things.

36. So, even if sometimes Michael said this:

37. It didn’t matter, because his profoundness far outweighed everything else.

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