18. The disheveled red carpet walker:
This is obviously an important moment in Cage’s life because it taught him about perseverance — perseverance to still “smile” even when the top of his head had seen better days.
17. The disheveled traveler:
Hey, none of us look perfect when we get off a plane. Except Nic Cage. He looks perfect.
16. The middle part:
AWWW. Baby’s first middle part! It’s always important to note when a male human tries out a middle part for the first time. This was that time and we are lucky enough to have captured it on film photography.
15. The bob:
It’s a bob. Like, a wavy black bob. As far as hair importance goes this ranks about a 13.
14. The mustached man:
“Daddy, daddy, I’m gonna have a mustache one day!” —Nicolas Cage, age 7, to his dad. This photo is solid proof that dreams come true.
13. The beach bum:
Ladies, take note. No product needed here, just natural beachy waves that are kissed by the sun.
12. The business kind of guy:
When life hands you lemons, sell those lemons and use your profits to buy hair gel and then do this to your hair. Bonus tip: Dip into your own funds to buy a T-shirt!
11. The dude ‘do:
Just made you say doo-doo.
7. The bang guy:
ANOTHER important milestone for men: their first set of bangs. He went above and beyond.
6. The Tom Cruise:
“Daddy, daddy, I wanna look like Tom Cruise one day.” —Nic Cage, age 9, to his dad. CONGRATS AGAIN FOR MAKING IT HAPPEN.
5. The blonde bombshell:
You might call this a midlife crisis, but I call it a stroke of genius. All the greats go blonde — just look at Pamela Anderson. If there was ever a moment that Nic Cage would randomly yell, “I’m Nic Cage! Look at me!” it would be right after this photo was taken.
4. The curlicue:
No hairstyle will ever be as simultaneously nightmarish and heavenly as this was. None.
3. The dark shadow:
I leave Nicolas Cage alone for two minutes and THIS IS WHAT HE DOES?
2. The blonde bombshell 2:
I SPOKE TO SOON ABOUT THE BLONDE HAIR AND WOULD LIKE TO APOLOGIZE. This hair actually cost 72 people their jobs and homes.