21 Things We Learned From Mario Kart 64

Besides the fact that it’s the greatest game ever.

1. Nothing is more satisfying than pressing the start button.

2. Always choose Toad.

3. You’d better have a big TV, because you’re only going to use half of it.

4. The longest three seconds of your life was waiting for this guy to save you.

5. The tunnel in Choco Mountain looked like a surprised face.

6. And Frappe Snowland is definitely just Canada.

7. The penguins will get you. Every. Damn. Time.

8. And you’ll probably hit yourself with your own green shells the most.

9. This shortcut was life changing.

10. So was this one…

11. And this one…

12. And this one, even though it took 10 tries.

13. Slow and steady on this part. Slow and steady.

14. This meant impending doom:

15. The three mushroom boost was only good for this part:

16. Never trust a question box in the middle of nowhere.

17. Bananas did not make you go faster, but they did look cool.

18. This bridge had a beautiful view.

19. If you got lightning, no one would be spared.

20. A star means HOPE.

21. And getting first place meant the other person was giving up their controller.

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