21 Things We Learned From Mario Kart 64

Besides the fact that it’s the greatest game ever.

1. Nothing is more satisfying than pressing the start button.

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2. Always choose Toad.

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3. You’d better have a big TV, because you’re only going to use half of it.

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4. The longest three seconds of your life was waiting for this guy to save you.

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5. The tunnel in Choco Mountain looked like a surprised face.

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6. And Frappe Snowland is definitely just Canada.

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7. The penguins will get you. Every. Damn. Time.

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8. And you’ll probably hit yourself with your own green shells the most.

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9. This shortcut was life changing.

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10. So was this one…

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11. And this one…

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12. And this one, even though it took 10 tries.

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13. Slow and steady on this part. Slow and steady.

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14. This meant impending doom:

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15. The three mushroom boost was only good for this part:

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16. Never trust a question box in the middle of nowhere.

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17. Bananas did not make you go faster, but they did look cool.

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18. This bridge had a beautiful view.

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19. If you got lightning, no one would be spared.

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20. A star means HOPE.

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21. And getting first place meant the other person was giving up their controller.

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