34 Ways You’re Never Going To Be As Cool As Rust Cohle

What’s cooler than being cool? ICE COHLED

1. You can’t explain life like Rust Cohle.

2. You can’t drink like Rust Cohle.

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3. You can’t be drunk like Rust Cohle.

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4. You can’t be a goddamn badass like Rust Cohle.

5. You don’t get to the point like Rust Cohle.

6. You can’t grow as a person like Rust Cohle.

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7. You can’t pull off a vest like Rust Cohle.

8. You can’t deal with money like Rust Cohle.

9. You don’t have a cool coffee mug like Rust Cohle.

BIG HUG MUG

10. You can’t flip people off like Rust Cohle.

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11. You can’t swear like Rust Cohle.

12. You can’t swear in an amazing accent like Rust Cohle.

13. You just can’t swear like Rust Cohle.

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14. You can’t give quality life advice like Rust Cohle.

15. You don’t carry a big ledger and have a badass nickname like ‘The Taxman’ like Rust Cohle.

16. You can’t slap people like Rust Cohle.

17. You can’t smoke like Rust Cohle.

18. You really can’t smoke like Rust Cohle.

19. You really, really can’t smoke like Rust Cohle.

20. Rust Cohle is good at smoking, is the point.

21. You can’t express philosophy with beer can men like Rust Cohle.

22. You can’t brood like Rust Cohle.

23. You can’t plan your work like Rust Cohle.

24. You don’t get respect like Rust Cohle.

25. You don’t have majestic facial hair like Rust Cohle.

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FUCKING LOOK AT IT.

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26. You don’t have incredible nature visions like Rust Cohle.

27. You can’t stare like Rust Cohle.

28. You can’t make judgements like Rust Cohle.

29. You can’t fight like Rust Cohle.

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30. You can’t make a threat like Rust Cohle.

31. You can’t be brutally self-aware like Rust Cohle.

32. You don’t understand the world as well as Rust Cohle.

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33. You don’t have a healthy attitude about life like Rust Cohle.

34. You can’t sit shirtless in a slightly blurry room like Rust Cohle.

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