1. The friend who manages the best wipe-out.
Yes, the person in the above photo should be wearing skis.
3. An older couple who are doing precisely one run a day before getting drunk in a mountain restaurant.
Actually, they might have nailed it.
4. A very small child who clearly lives in resort, and is ludicrously more talented than you.
Why are you doing front flips, and where are your parents?
5. A group of teens building tiny jumps next to the slope.
Slightly too scared to try the actual park, but know that ‘jumps’ are important. It’s a compromise.
6. A group who are continually trying to out-do each other, until someone gets injured.
8. The skiier who appears to be deliberately turning into your path to block you.
9. The person who fails to notice that other people are skiing on the same bit of snow.
12. And the people really not wearing either costumes or ski gear.
13. The ski season worker(s) with goggle marks that are never going to fade.
14. A snowboarder who’s going down the slope sideways and evenly scrubbing off the snow.
16. Someone who injures themselves on the first day, and spends the rest of the week in a cast.
50-50 chance that it actually happened in the bar.
17. The guy whose kit gives up on him halfway through a run.
18. The guy whose beard has started to cause problems in the weather.
Starts off warm. Doesn’t end up warm.
19. The guy who drinks every night, and actually fails to ever make it to the slope.
20. The guy who appears to have been in resort since it opened. In 1972.
21. Someone sitting in the landing area of a jump, who is nearly decapitated multiple times before moving.
22. The people who find a bar on top the mountain.
And sometimes make it down as well.
24. The person who only cares about powder.
26. The person who loses their ski in powder. And spends an hour trying to find it.
27. Someone pointing out that these slopes would totally be a different classification in a different region.
True, possibly, but not useful.
28. The guy who manages to fall over and get stuck. On the ground.
Turns out, 12 feet of metal strapped to your feet doesn’t make getting up easier.
29. Someone who takes the awesome photos.