1. Imagine this one lying next to you on the pillow
2. Or how about this handsome chap for your bedside table?
3. What about this one? Its eyes might look bruised, but they’re throwing in that lovely ring
4. But if it’s real value for money you’re looking for this lifeless Royal baby comes with a free coffin AND a spoon
5. For those of you who like your infants in polythene bags, this one is just perfect
6. Maybe you’re after a more cosmopolitan baby. This one holidays in Marbs.
7. No? You probaby prefer your babies to be made of china then. How about this one shivering under a flag?
8. Don’t you just LOVE the regretful solemnity that comes with this cheeky pair?
9. Yeah you’re right, these babies are all a bit traditional aren’t they? How about this motionless newborn in an on-trend tee?
10. Oh come on… these figurines of John Travolta holding your royal baby would look simply FAB on the mantelpiece
11. No? Well there really is no pleasing some people.
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