1. Being a defensive driver means carrying multiple bananas on your person.
5. Don’t drive the wrong way unless you want a finger wagged in your face.
6. Most spin-outs are caused by bananas left in the road.
7. Seatbelts just make it harder to jump up and down in your seat when you’re celebrating.
12. Avoid freak electrical storms, the leading cause of being tiny.
Here Are Today's Top Stories
- A Harris County, Texas, sheriff's deputy was ambushed Friday night when a man walked up and repeatedly shot him from behind. ›
- Dominica Prime Minister Roosevelt Skerrit said that Tropical Storm Erika killed 20 people there, and set the island back 20 years from the damage. ›
- Police are investigating the death of Jamycheal Mitchell, who was arrested months ago in Virginia for allegedly stealing about $5 worth of groceries. He was found dead in his jail cell last week. ›